When I first studied StoryBrand with Don Miller and his team, I thought I had a solid grasp of how to effectively communicate my business. That illusion lasted about ten minutes.
One of the exercises asked us to run the entire StoryBrand framework on our own businesses. Forty of us sat there, scribbling our versions of the story we wanted our clients to hear. Then Don’s team wandered the room, listening, critiquing, and offering suggestions. Their most frequent critique? ‘…too many words.’
I can still hear Don’s voice ringing in my ears: “If you confuse, you lose.” And one of the fastest ways to confuse the very clients you’re trying to attract is by burying them under a landslide of words. It’s a mistake I had made myself. Like many of the folks in that room, I believed the more words I used, the smarter and more persuasive I sounded. What I learned that day was that the opposite is true.
The Seduction of More Words
So why do so many businesses fall into the trap of using too many words in their messaging?
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They’re too close to their own product. When you live inside your offering every day, you know every detail, feature, and possible outcome. The temptation is to reveal everything. To you, it feels like providing value. To your prospect, it feels like punishment.
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They confuse thoroughness with clarity. Many believe that if they say everything, nothing important will be left out. But research shows that the human brain does not process “everything.” It processes what is clear, relevant, and emotionally resonant.
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They fear being misunderstood. Ironically, the more they talk, the greater the chance of being misunderstood. Piling on words to protect against misinterpretation often creates exactly the confusion they hoped to avoid.
Why Less Really Is More
There’s a neurological reason Don’s mantra works. Cognitive scientists have long demonstrated that our brains are wired for efficiency. The average adult attention span has dropped to around 8.25 seconds, shorter than a goldfish, according to Microsoft’s consumer insights lab.
The Journal of Neuroscience published findings that when faced with too much information, the brain shifts into a state of “cognitive overload.” Instead of engaging, it disengages, conserving energy for simpler, easier tasks. Translation: your prospects won’t work hard to figure out what you mean. If you don’t make it instantly clear, their brain taps out.
Business legend Jim Collins put it bluntly: “If you have more than three priorities, you don’t have any.” The same principle applies to communication. If you cram six paragraphs of features into a brochure, you’re not making six points. You’re making none.
Seth Godin echoes this in his signature style: “People do not buy goods and services. They buy relations, stories, and magic.” Stories and magic don’t thrive in clutter. They need space to breathe.
The Hidden Costs of Over-Worded Marketing
Too many words don’t just create confusion; they actively damage your credibility and your sales pipeline. Here’s how:
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They make you sound insecure. Prospects can smell desperation. Over-explaining makes it appear that you don’t believe your product can stand on its own.
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They delay decision-making. Behavioral economists have shown that too many choices paralyze buyers. The same holds true for too many words. When prospects face a wall of copy, they push the decision down the road. And later, it rarely comes.
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They rob your message of emotional punch. Emotion drives buying decisions. However, emotion gets lost in the weeds when every possible detail vies for attention.
Examples: Bloated vs. Clear
Over-worded pitch:
“Our software platform is an industry-leading, best-in-class, scalable solution that leverages cutting-edge artificial intelligence technology to provide a robust, comprehensive suite of customizable features that can be uniquely tailored to fit the diverse and evolving needs of businesses across multiple verticals and industries.”
Clear pitch:
“Our software helps businesses cut costs and save time by automating repetitive tasks.”
Which one would you remember?
Over-worded pitch:
“Our new toothbrush has patented, triple-density bristles that are scientifically designed to optimize plaque removal while enhancing gum health, paired with an ergonomic, slip-resistant handle to ensure superior comfort and usability for a wide range of customers.”
Clear pitch:
“This toothbrush cleans better and feels great in your hand.”
The difference is night and day. One is designed to impress colleagues. The other is designed to connect with customers.
The Communication Touch Point
This issue isn’t confined to your marketing collateral. It’s about every communication touch point your business has with the outside world. Every email, every presentation, every video is either clarifying your value or burying it under noise.
Mark Twain once quipped: “I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.” The same holds true for marketing. It’s easy to pile on words. It takes real discipline to cut them down to what matters. But when you do, your clients finally hear you.
In that first StoryBrand workshop, I learned that fewer words don’t mean less meaning. They mean more power. More resonance. More trust. And in business, trust is everything.
Final Word
The myth of more words is one of the most expensive myths in marketing. More words don’t make you sound smarter. They don’t make your product look better. They don’t close more sales.
Clarity wins. Brevity wins. Simplicity wins. The companies that succeed are those that ruthlessly strip away excess words until only the meaning remains.
Because at the end of the day, if your clients can’t understand you quickly and easily, they won’t act. And if they can’t hear your message above the noise, you’re on mute.
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